The Diatribe * net

You try to figure this out!

So after my last post on commuting mishaps, you probably thought I would ship up. That I’d finally find my way around the labyrinth subway system of the NYC Metro area. I’d get some sense in my head and realize that when walking on an Avenue, say 6th, if the Street numbers are going up, like 34th, 35th, 36th, the East side of the city is on your Right and West Side, Left. When the Street numbers are going down, then the East side is on your Left and West Side, Right. Oh and did I leave out that the lower Avenues, like 2nd and 3rd, are on the East Side? Simple enough, right? Certainly not rocket science. I mean that’s all you need to know, for the most part, to navigate NYC. Well, when you come up out of the subway, disorientation sets in and all bets are off…

What if you find yourself needing to transfer from the V train to Penn Station for the PATH to New Jersey and you come out at 34th and 6th Ave, and the sign says one block west for Penn Station at 32nd and 7th?

Now, I don’t know about you, but I immediately think someone’s math is off, because how can 32nd and 7th be one block away? And never mind, which direction is West. To make matters worse, Broadway crosses 6th Ave right at this point, so there isn’t a 7th to be seen and I still haven’t unravelled the mysteries of what Broadway crossing an Avenue means. Basically, Broadway just throws me off completely.

I walk toward the numbers going down to 32nd and enter a station that claims to have the PATH, but get down there and see no signs for the PATH, but see signs pointing toward an exit for Penn Station at 32nd and 7th (I’m getting that point, at least). So up I go and golly gee, I’m back at 32nd and 6th. So I walk to the left, toward what I hope (pray) is 7th Ave… (this is where, if i hadn’t already been thrown off, I would have realized my mistake, as #s down, Left is East) but alas, I get down the block, and mind you going crosstown (ie. between avenues) is not short, only to find that what I am approaching is 5th ave! Finally, back at 32nd and 6th, I go underground again (through a different entrance this time) and suddenly wahla! the signs are in my favor and point to the PATH. Coming from my original direction, you can’t see the signs. Ugh.

Now, you’re probably thinking this has to be the worst of it right? But no. I’m so wicked super smart that on Friday evening I pulled off an even greater feat. After drinking with co-workers for a few hours, I wait for the 7 train at Grand Central station and somehow end up in Queens. Is Queens where I wanted to be? No. Is it where I ended up? Yes.

Yup, that’s right. I got on the wrong train. Fortunately, I realized it almost immediately. So I got off at the first stop in Queens and then had to go above ground (let me just say I’m glad I live in Hoboken and not that part of Queens) to switch to the other side to pay ANOTHER $2.00 to take the train my usual 2 stops to Times Square to then walk underground to Port Authority to then take the #126 bus back to Hoboken. And all in a day’s work…

Let’s just say that on the Queens front, I think I’ve learned my lesson. But who knows what else tomorrow will bring… I’m just hoping it isn’t a trip to Brooklyn.