After four glorious months, the Cool Jesus beard has been packed away until November. Sure, it might make a brief appearance before then, but since it brings with it nearly two weeks of itchiness, once it’s gone, it’s usually gone for good. You may remember from the original What’s with the Beard?, that I was secretly waiting for comments from friends, roommates, or co-workers and they eventually came raining down upon me. The big VP in my office even called me “Honest Abe,” despite the fact that I did not have a chinstrap beard (nor a stovepipe hat, but that’s a whole other sartorial rant).
Swedish Girl had informed me that I resemble Jason Lee’s character, Earl Hickey, on one of my new favorite TV shows, My Name Is Earl. Not exactly what you want to hear from your special lady friend, but at least she didn’t say I resemble his brother Randy (portrayed by the legendary Ethan Suplee). At any rate, on Saturday morning I initially shaved the beard into a tribute to Earl, but even I couldn’t allow myself to leave the house looking like that with the floppy mustache and lampchop sideburns. I was worried I’d set off an Amber Alert in my neighborhood, so it all came off – using my two-blade Schick Tracer FX, I might add.
Roommate Petro noticed right away, so he at least guaranteed a return of What’s with the Beard? I guess it’s a two-part game, with this flip side named something like Oh, You Shaved? However, either my co-workers haven’t noticed or they’ve finally learned to respect my space and pretend I’m invisible. Either way, it’s a relief.
