According to an article in last week’s Star Ledger, the state of New Jersey has been working on a new slogan to try to improve the state’s image. Some of them are absolutely hilarious. I allow you to pick your favorite amonsgt the submissions.
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Last night, MP and I ventured on a trip back to our childhood.. Well, maybe her childhood, I did this just a few years ago. Anyway, we carved pumpkins. While I think she neglected to remember how much cleaning and de-gunking there was involved in the whole carving process, she managed to make one of the scariest pumpkins I’ve seen. A co-worker actually asked me if she was a KISS fan — to which I answered “uhhh… no.” Mine is the messed up ’scary’ tree which isn’t so scary, and doesn’t look that much like a tree.

Things that are getting on my nerves as of late:

I cannot wait until WNYC ends their pledge drive. I’ve given them money.. I think it’s the first time I’ve ever considered making a pledge for public broadcasting. It felt good. Now let’s get back to the programming. It’s been going on (for what seems like) years!

I absolutely detest CNN’s newest temporary anchor. Every morning for the last 5 years I’ve watched CNN’s morning show. I’ve always loved the cast: Jack Cafferty (wherever he has gone), Miles O’Brien, Soledad O’Brien (no relation), Anderson Cooper (yes, he started on CNN AM), Bill Hemmer (another MIA), Paula Zahn (the one who started it all), Sanjay Gupta, Chad Myers, Andy Sewer (minding your business!) and Jefferey Toobin (on law). Every once in a while someone will go on vacation, which will lead to someone filling it. Usually this filler-inner is a future host of the show (at least from what I’ve seen).. But, this new person Zain something-or-other is horrible. She’s driving me nuts. She flirts with everyone on the show, and makes stupid side-remarks at everything that is said. I can’t stand it. CNN — TAKE HER AWAY!

Yesterday I went to go buy a cookie at the weekly Journal Square Farmer’s market. After giving the nice lady $1.50 for my Hamentaschen (yes, they have them there year round — strange), a woman comes out of nowhere and askes me “Can I please have a dollar.” I’ve got my wallet in my hand, and she’s seen my 3 singles that I have. What am I supposed to say? Next time: No. Definitely not. Sorry. I don’t care. This time: Umm.. yeah, I guess (with a sigh, and a disgruntled look towards the woman selling me my Jewish treat). Since when is it acceptable to ask for a dollar. I thought it was “Can you spare some change?!” Since when is a dollar “Change.”

Things that have made me happy as of late:

Flickr now supports print ordering. Now you can go and order 4×6’s of any Flickr photo (including my own), for just 20 cents! Not only that, for $16.99 you can order a 20 pack of stamps with that photo on it. About time!!!

A new video from Grandaddy (a band that I found at Bonnaroo) filmed entirely on an Apple II computer. Excellent.

So, while I haven’t had anything substantial to post (besides snakes and snakes biting off people’s dale sveum’s and other nonsense) .. I figured I’d continue with that trend. Posting nonsense is better than not posting — right?

Rumor has it, we’re supposed to be getting a Northeastern. It’s been coming up the coast, and it just started raining here in NJ this evening. How exciting!

The heat has kicked in, and my slippers are on. Summer is over. (How not exciting).

But finally, they’ve aired this new commercial in England for Guinness. I find it very exciting!

(All this — and I was still able to adjust my periodic scripts using Tiger’s launchd plist’s to perform maintenance at a more appropriate time, and repair all of my disk permissions without having to do anything! HOW EXCITING!)

One of the most amazing Internet Marketing campaigns ever launched has got to be the Subservient Chicken. For those of you unfamiliar with this famous chicken, it’s a Burger King “ad” for their chicken sandwhich (which was new at the time of launch, now — not so much).

Either way, it’s amazingly clever. I just thought I’d have to share with everyone, in the event that you’re unfamiliar with our friend the chicken. Now, if you’d like to talk about Burger King’s latest marketing campaign &emdash; The King.. Well, let’s just say that he’s the pretty damn scary.

Meanwhile, I just found that you can buy the King Mask or a Subservient chicken mask online. Unfortunately the King is sold out, otherwise I’d most definitely wear it out on Halloween. But the Web site, is absolutely out of control. Captain / CJ &emdash; I highly recommend it. Link.

So, thanks to my loving mother — I’m definitely no longer using any toilet facilities. I realized a day or so ago that I had posted my UK snake item under Miss Possible’s name.. but of course, it’s yours truly that has the incredible fear of the specific reptile variety.

In any event, I thought I’d follow up and share — that there are snakes here in NJ Toilets. If it was Lousianana or Michigan or St. Peterburg, Florida.. I wouldn’t care. But here in New Jersey? Oy.

Six-Foot Snake Makes Toilet Home

They say New York is the city of cities, too small to be a country, too large to be a town. The city of possibilities. The city of everything. The city of right angles and tough, damaged people. The city of wakeful dreaming, fortunate accidents, random meetings and sudden engagements. New York is the city of the 20th century.

I have to admit that I haven’t experienced much of this yet. But alas, this is the world according to Google and so NYC according to The Muse Hotel, Amazon, New York Safety and Survival Guide, Lyrics007, the Michigan Land Use Institute, all and all a motley crue (fine, it’s really crew, but I can’t help one 80s reference in this entry).

Of course, what I have experienced is that New York is the city of smokers, and more specifically walking smokers.

LTJ and I were recently discussing this phenomenon. No where have I seen more people walking and smoking than in NYC. They are everywhere at all times of day, but most annoyingly on the way into work.

My morning pace could be described as just one notch below running. I weave through the jammed sidewalks and subway stations like a race car driver on the edge, willing to do anything to reach the finish line first. People who think they are walking fast in the tunnel between Port Authority and Times Sq drop their jaw in disbelief when I breeze past them on the left quickly darting into the oncoming melee to slide back into my lane just in time to avoid a head on collison. No joke.

There is a fine art to the New York commute and most mornings I am on my game. There are only a few things that can gum up the works:

1) People parked in the fast lane: Yes, New York is full of tourists and none of them seem to realize that the left lane is the fast lane and if you are either slow or stopped you better get in the right OR ELSE. This rule applies to escalators, subway tunnels and sidewalks.

2) People with broken tail lights who pull the e-brake: Do not stop immediately after a turnstile, escalator, subway door, or subway platform. Not only is this extremely frustrating, it can also lead to serious accidents. Wake up people!

3) Inconsiderate riders who enter the train while people are still exiting: This is also very dangerous. In fact, one time the subway doors closed on me while I was trying to exit because people pushed me in while entering. I had to force the doors open to escape and it left black marks on me. NYC subway waits for no one!

4) Walking smokers: As I previously mentioned, I walk as fast as possible to work. One of the worst things is getting stuck behind a smoker. Not only am I breathing in lungfuls of air, they are full of smoke. I’m seriously starting to think that banning smoking from the streets wouldn’t be such a bad idea.

Gosh, why do I always write about commuting? Anyone?

When I was Captain Larby’s original college roommate, my musical tastes tried his patience.  To his credit, he kept his critiques to himself.  He seemed to be okay with hearing The Doors several times a day, every day.  He put up with Green Day, The Cranberries, The Police, and even the Aladdin soundtrack.  It was only years later that he let it slip how my incessant playing of a Best of Frank Sinatra CD nearly drove him crazy.  I was probably a bit more vocal at the time about how I didn’t really want Phish to be the soundtrack of my life. 

While he bit his tongue, he set out on a mission to convert me, or at least get me to play something he would also enjoy.  There was old 70s David Bowie, there was jazz and funk, there was Pink Floyd, and Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young (my favorite among Larby’s conversion music.  But sometime in the winter of 1996, something happened that not only got us on the same page, but our whole floor, the whole dorm, and the entire campus.  The Score by Fugees. 

That was just about all we played for months.  We memorized lyrics and acted out the two thugs in the Chinese retaurant skit.  We ate The Score, we drank The Score, we breathed The Score, we lived The Score, and we debated its significance in the hip-hop canon.  It became the soundtrack for our freshman year and it had the power to bridge the summer break and last into the beginning of our sophomore year.  We couldn’t wait for more material from Fugees. 

That was nine years ago.  Sometime around 1998 or 1999, we all resigned ourselves to the fact that we were unlikely to be treated to another Fugees record ever again.  We just wanted more Fugees to make us feel young.  To make us feel like we did when we were 19.  It was like a time machine.  In fact, I didn’t actually purchase The Score until about a year or year and a half ago.  It still called out to me from the record store.  It is a link to a shared past that I’ll never get back again, but I’ll never forget either.

Today is a glorious day.  Today, I read that Fugees are back together and 2006 will bring their long-awaited follow-up album.  Captain Larby understands where I’m coming from.  Matty Ballgame, Dr. Doop, DJ Cornbread, Sean K., Sarko G., and The Monkey might even have an inkling.  Dr. Little, if you’re out there, you definitely hear me.

http://www.boston.com/ae/music/cd_reviews/articles/2005/10/04/after_long_silence_fugees_are_making_a_joyful_noise/